Struggling to get turned on? Boredom struck in the bedroom? Don't worry ladies, every couple is bound to hit a dry spell every once and a while, we're only human after all. And speaking of sexual slumps, new research has shown that 65% of people prefer REALITY to lure fictions. So why not ditch your 50 Shades novel and start bringing your sexual fantasies to real life.
Durex’s sex and relationship expert, Susan Quilliam says, “Naturally we are drawn to exploring our sexual potential, to extending our boundaries and seeking new sensations. We look for inspiration in everyday life, from videos and books but we don’t always bring those adventures to life.”
In light of this new research (and in finding out that 50 Shades film wasn't quite as raunchy as we actually hoped), we took inspiration from Durex’s new guide of #50GamesToPlay and put our own little twist on it. Here’s what to do to ACTUALLY get turned on....
1. The power is in the gaze
Great sex is all about the connection you make. Sit opposite each other and gaze into each other’s eyes. Try to do it without looking away or laughing…don't worry, after a few awkward seconds you’ll begin to make a connection. See how long you can do it before you can’t hold back from reaching out to kiss him.
2. Write to him
Write 5 things your beau does that makes you go crazy for him and make him to do the same thing. Whether it's his random naughty whispers or slipping his hands up your skirt unexpectedly, go on a date and reenact everything you both wrote down. The sheer excitement and spontaneity is sure to make you both hot.
3. Go on a sensuous walk
Have your partner blindfold you and guide you around the room. Have him expose you to different textures and have try to guess what you're touching. If you're up for the challenge do it naked and if you really want to be daring let him tie you to the bed and bring the objects to you...
4. Choose the spot
Let your partner pick three of his most sensitive parts. Now create an experience he’ll never forget using only the three that he chose. Lube and candle wax are permitted!
5. Breakfast in bed
One of you gets blindfolded and fed tiny morsels of food. Have them guess what it is but make sure to keep them surprised by using different textures and temperatures. Champagne, ice cream or warm chocolate sauce goes down a treat!
6. Dance together
Book a dancing class together and get moving. Salsa is a great choice - by the time you make it home the sexy intimate moves will make you feel closer, more connected and ready for some kinky fun.
7. Water play
One of you lies in the bath while the other sits along the outside. Now pleasure your partner only using the shower attachment. Warning: this may cause flooding.
8. Shhhh
Try to have sex without making a sound - even when you climax! But don’t forget to set a forfeit for the loser. The winner gets whatever they demand.
9. Write your partner a love letter
Write your partner a love letter stating exactly what you want them to do to you and how. Now post it through the letter box when he least expects it and watch his anticipation build throughout the day. If you’re feeling really naughty, send it to his work. He’ll have no idea what’s coming for him!
10. Say it in words
Be imaginative! Think of the sexiest, hottest words out there…words like ‘nibble’, throbbing’ or ‘seduce’ are all a good start. After you pick one word choose another arousing word that the previous one reminds you of, make it as sexy as possible and after try combining the words for a sexy hot sesh.
11. Treasure hunt
Tell your partner you have something in store for them. Now create a trail of tempting items such as love notes, rose petals, lube or handcuffs and lead them all the way to the bedroom. Wrap yourself up in a red kinky ribbon and lay on the bed naked ready to play. Now, blow. His. Mind.
12. Mirroring pleasure
Sit opposite each other while one of you caresses the other one doing just what he (or she) likes. Make sure to mirror what the other one is doing and have fun learning what makes them go crazy. Trust us, you won’t be able to keep your hands off each other for long…
13. Bound them
Keep your partner captive and demand they don’t move (but don’t tie him up). Pleasure your captive and give them permission when it’s okay to move, speak or touch. It’s up to you how aroused you get him...
14. #PlayTogether
On a chilly day make sure to take along your coat BUT make sure to leave everything else behind. Meet your beau outside work and tell him you're wearing nothing else.
But don't fret, turning each other on doesn't always have to involve being out and about. Share LELO's new movie trailer for Beyond the Wave and get access to their hot interactive PlayTogether experience helping you feel closer and more sexual than you'd ever thought possible. We're hooked.
15. Aphrodisiac feast
Each choose your three favourite foods and eat it seductively in front of your partner. We’re pretty sure eating a banana in front of him will make him go crazy inside. Ask him how he likes it...
16. Pin them down
Gently pinning your partner down and making love to them will add an S&M vibe to it without all the ropes and whips.
17. Masquerade ball
Buy a pair of exotic masks and wear them when you next make love together. It may seem a bit odd at first but, trust us, the unfamiliarity will get you steaming...
18. Body audit
One of you sits perfectly still while the other caresses from head to toe, making sure not to miss a spot. Have your partner rate each touch with a number between 1 and 5, one being good and five being amazing. Next time you make love, you’ll know exactly what to do.
19. Sexy draw
Write six locations and six body parts on small cut pieces of paper. Put them in two separate bowls and have your partner pick one from each. It’s their turn to stimulate the chosen body part in the chosen location. Enjoy…
20. In sync
Choose a song that has a rising beat to it that you both like. When you’re having sex try to move in rhythm with the beat and become one with it. Once the song climaxes, you have permission to do so too...
21. Creative combos
Write down your fave ten positions on separate cards and write down a series of timings (from 3 minutes to 1 hour) on ten separate card too. Now have your partner pick his fave two and see how and for how long you have to make it last for…
22. Twenty questions
Ask your partner twenty questions to unveil their hottest sexual fantasies. But make sure you’re asking them questions they can only say ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to. You might find you both have the same ones!
23. Tantalising tales
Create an erotic story together by taking it in turns. He might say “I came home from work and couldn’t stop starring at you changing out of your work clothers.” Now continue… (You can try this via text messages too.)
24. Hide and seek
Blindfold your partner and hide somewhere. Have them find you by following your voice. The suspense and prize (i.e. YOU) will have them wanting you more than ever.
25. Truth or dare
Go old school and both write a series of curious truths and dares you want them to fulfil on a pieces of paper. Now fold them up and take your pick…
26. Food play
Instead of eating dinner around the table tonight pick a few things from the fridge and eat it off your partner. Trust us, you’ll both being exploding with the different sensations. P.S. make sure to lay a towel on the bed to avoid the mess.
27. Big hug
Set a timer and hug for five minutes. That’s right, whether you’re lying down, standing still or sitting make sure to keep it going for five whole minutes. By that time your heartbeat, breathes and even your blood pressure will have synchronised.
28. Sounds of silence
Have your partner wear a pair of noise cancelling headphones and allow them to feel the deeper sensations as you caress them all over. If you want to make them even more excited, blindfold them too…
29. Get caught
Next time you're having a shower make sure to leave the door cracked open so your partner is inclined to take a peek. Seeing you wet and naked in the shower will be hard to just to walk by…
30. Jigsaw fantasy
Draw one of your steamiest fantasies on a piece of A4 paper and cut it into 6 squares. Now hide them around the house and send your partner looking for them. Each one he finds he gets a sexual reward. Once he find all 6 he has to put it together and act it out. It’s a win win for both of you!
31. Mystery meet up
Meet up at the same place after work, but make sure it’s somewhere you’ve never been before. Make eye contact, flirt and introduce yourself as your kinky naughty persona. If all goes well bring him back to your hotel room and have your sexy way with him.
32. Book club
Grab an erotic book and start reading it together before bed. Pick a scene you know your partner likes and reenact it with him. No one's got time for sleep...
33. The ultimate massage
Have your partner lay face down while you cover yourself in pleasure gel and use your entire body to massage them. Swap positions and see who climaxes the quickest. The winner gets to pick your next raunchy position.
34. On the edge
Get each other HOT with desire (foreplay anyone?) and just before you’re about the climax make him pull back. Work it up again, pushing it to tipping point . See how far you can both go before one of you cracks.
35. Say it like it is
One of you lies down while the other touches all over. The receiver has to says how fast or slow they want it and at what pressure. Keep it going until the very end. Giving each other exactly what you want can only lead to one thing. Great sex!
36. Sexy lap dance
Have your man sit down while you give him a sexy lap dance but don’t let him touch! If he's well behaved by the end of it, feel free to let him play...
37. Show him who’s boss
One of you bosses each other around for one full hour, in and out of the bed. No one misses out though, tomorrow you switch roles. Dominance can be HOT.
38. Fill in the gaps
Think of the places in the house you’ve never had sex in. This could be on top of the washing machine, on the kitchen table or if you’re feeling fearless even the back garden! Start ticking them off your list.
39. The first time
Imagine one of you is having sex for the first time. Be gentle, show them how and guide them to what works best for you. Trust, the innocence will be hotter than you think…
40. If…but…
Begin your sentence by saying ‘My fantasy is…’ and end with ‘but I prefer the reality of you…’ If you both agree on one, ACTION it!
41. Find your fantasy
Spend a whole evening searching for your hottest fantasies online and discuss how you could put it into play. We doubt you’ll be ready for bed yet.
42. Undress me
One of you requests how you would like to be undressed. Things like ‘raunchily’ and ‘seductively’ are good one’s to go for. Now make sure it's delivered...
43. Love wrestling
Wrestle each other or start a playful pillow fight with THIS forfeit in mind, oral sex. Lets see who’s the more competitive one…
44. What should I wear?
Have your partner choose an outfit for you to wear that evening and wear it for him. This gives you an opportunity to see what each other likes and turn him on. Next time it’s your turn to choose…
45. Sex scene
Screen your fave sexy film for your partner and pause it at the hottest scenes. Tell him what it is that turns you on about it and see what happens next.
46. Never apart
Being really close to your partner kicks your hormones into boost. Spend the whole day touching, feeling caressing and making sure you’re never out of contact. This will ensure you’re closer than ever.
47. Deck of cards
If you pick shades, you get a massage, if you choose clubs, you get kissed, if you choose diamonds, your partner arouses you with their hands, if you choose hearts they arouse you with their mouth. And the number of cards? That's the seconds to perform it. GO!
48. Wear heels and nothing else
Wear a pair of killer heels and a shade of bright, red lippy. Get home early and surprise your man at the door when he gets home - sorry honey, there won't be any dinner tonight...
49. Sexy cinema
Go to the cinema when it's really quiet and pick the most boring film on the list. Give your partner all your attention and do naughty things without getting caught. The suspense and sheer frustration will have you wanting more.
50. Go comando
We all go to bed in our usual comfy pyjamas, no? Keep things low key tonight and shock him when you jump into bed. Getting in naked while he can feel the sensation of your skin against his body will wake him right up. Literally.
How do you keep things exciting in the bedroom? Let us know @sofeminineUK!
You might also like:
10 Spontaneous Sex Tips That Will Blow His Mind
How To Have Great Sex! 10 Do's & Don'ts For Mind-Blowing Sexy Time
10 Fifty Shades Of Grey Inspired Ways To Kink Up Your Sex Life
