Whether you're creating a new profile or giving your old one a makeover, here are 10 tips that will help you in your quest for love. You're welcome.
Picture Perfect
Profile pictures are important. Call it vanity, but your picture is what makes people look at your profile. Here’s how to pick the right one.
1. Always use a photo on your profile
It’s obvious profiles without photos attract little attention. And yes you love puppies and cute babies but these don’t belong in your profile picture. Use a picture of yourself, don't be scared that someone you know will see you, ain't no shame in the love game.
2. Make sure you are the main attraction
Be the main focus in your profile picture, don’t choose a picture where you aren't the main focal point. Avoid group photos, this is your profile and it's all about YOU!
3. Use summery photographs
Research from Match.com found that people in summery photographs,on holiday, or outside on a hot day, were seen as more attractive than in their winter pics. So flick through your holiday albums and add a recent summer time photo.
4. Demonstrate open body language in your pictures
Don't wrap your arms round yourself, hide behind glasses or turn away from the camera, no matter how cool and casual the image looks. It's off-putting online, instead face the camera and try to look approachable, less pouty and more smiling. Someone needs to imagine being with you and feeling comfortable.
5. Make sure your photos are recent
Avoid selling false dreams, yes you looked amazing in that picture from 5 years ago, but do you still look like that now?
The number one issue that puts daters off is "photos showing a dramatically different body shape".
6. Use photos to back up your profile
If you describe yourself as sporty, outdoorsy or sociable, use a photo that demonstrates that. Let people imagine themselves spending time with you in your life.
Username
What’s in a name? A lot apparently, here’s how to pick the perfect username for your dating profile.
7. Choose a name that describes your physical appearance
Remember men are visual! Think "brown eyed blonde" or "Jennifer Aniston’s Twin". Don't try to be award-winningly creative or original here, let your profile text and photos do the work.
*side note* I am not too sure about this one, but who am I to argue with the expert? So I am thinking my new username is gonna be “Beyonce’sTwin89” she didn’t say it had to be true.
Profile Text
This is where the magic happens, and every word counts. So take notes.
8. Keep it short and very sweet
Women have a tendency to write too much, because we enjoy reading long profiles.
Men are not like us! I repeat men are not like us!
Sum yourself up briefly. Don’t be afraid to include something intriguing, like "something you'd never guess by looking at me is..." and add a claim to fame or a childhood ambition. Keep it light, fun and short.
9. Don't mention past relationships
This is dating 101, it gives the impression that you’re not over an ex. Exes, baggage and past-relationships are subjects you can discuss in person later. But not on the first three dates.
List your most sociable hobbies, rather than the solitary ones
Yes you love spending hours watching Netflix in you PJs but no body needs to know that, yet.
Describing yourself as a "bookworm” or an “Internet addict" makes them feel they'd never see you. Instead, play up your love of anything sporty, outdoorsy, or social, like concerts, festivals and exhibitions.
soFeminine Dating Profiles
We took the challenge of making our own dating profiles, and had relationship expert Kate Taylor tell us the good, the bad and the just plain ugly.
Here's what Kate had to say about Emmy's imaginary profile:
NEVER! use a photo where you're drinking alcohol! I don't know exactly why, but those photos score the worst out of any kind of photo online. Definitely lose the wine.
I'd probably take your hair down too. Not only do men love hair when it's down, but it'll show off its colour.
A man who loves red hair will love to see it down and it'll make him contact you.
I know you're a TV writer but you must like doing other things outside your house,trying out new restaurants? Seeing concerts? Wine-tasting? Including purely "solitary" hobbies is a no-no.
A potential partner must be able to picture spending time with you, and early on you're not going to be cosying up on the sofa watching TV.
Everything else is fine. I like how this profile is short. Men typically don't enjoy trawling through long profiles.
Change you username to something less traceable. Using your real name is a HUGE no-no.
The interests are great as they work for dates and they're interesting enough for a man to comment on them in a first email. First rule of online dating: make it easy for them to write to you. A good hobby is something he can talk about.
Easy-going, laid-back - these are great words to use. Men aren't looking for drama in love. Your photo is great, but it will work better full length. Reconsider changing your body type, men read thin as bony, words like athletic and slim work better.
Your profile text works well, it's basic but gives enough detail to be interesting. You sound happy, which is attractive.
Your body type is "fruity" what does that mean? I'd be honest here. If you're curvy, say curvy. The biggest reason some first dates don't lead to second dates is because people had unmet expectations. If you fudge the truth about age, weight, or choose a pic that doesn't look like you, your date will be annoyed. In short, if you're slightly larger, make that clear on your profile by choosing a flattering but truthful photo. Display who you are and have faith. The best online dating sites have so many members that your chances of finding someone who loves you, just as you are, are very high.
Your profile photo is nice photo but but you'd need to include a full-length shot too. Research shows women who flirt into the camera lens receive way more interests than those who don't also lose the wedding-finger ring!
I'd remove references to having "no filter", men will worry you'd insult their family and friends, and remove "smart ass reply". You don't want to sound like you'll be hard work.
If you're proud of your rapier wit, display it on your second date or when appropriate in your emails. Until then, focus on simply looking like you'd be someone who'd be fun and easy to spend time with.
Your list of what you are looking for is too long, beware of the shopping list. People don't read them, or they worry they'll never match up. Keep it to two things, not five, and again, lose references to "lip".
Your photo is nice. Selfies work very well online, but maybe lose the scarf.
Solitary interests don't work online. Saying you enjoy great company is good, but don't immediately mention your cat like he's your only idea of great company.
Don't mention bed. Breakfasts in bed is too saucy. Use the interests section to help a potential dater picture going on a date with you, and give them an idea of what type of date you'd like. Help them build up a picture of being in a relationship with you. Make it easy for them to write to you. Breakfast in bed isn't a safe date activity.
We've been told!
OK so our profiles were imaginary and in some cases partly fictional (there is no cat called Bert), but we definitely learnt a lot about what to try and what to avoid.
What do you think of Kate's tips, will you be updating your online profile. Tweet us @sofeminineUK
This article was written by Tolani Shoneye. Tweet her and appreciate her lip @tolly_t
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