The First Photoshoot
Ah, yes. The first photo you'll send to family and post on Facebook to announce to the world that your baby is here (and really adorable)!!
Too bad newborns look like startled naked mole rats when they get their first photo taken!
The Grocery Store Trip
A fun errand where you can teach your kid all about veggies, fruits, and even surprise them with a box of ice-cream bars for being so well-behaved.
No, they definitely won't be distracted by the sugary foods and the kids acting like brats in the other aisles!
The Irrational Tantrum
Dream:
When your kids are having a meltdown over nothing you hope that reason and time will subdue them eventually.
Reality
Except that doesn't happen.
The Exercise Game
...and you'll incorporate your kid into the routine for some extra bonding time!
Yeah, right.
The First Word
You hoooope it's going to be "Mummy," "Daddy," or "Love" but most of the time it's something boring...or dirty!
Dream
Reality
The Discipline Dream
You'll always explain in calm, rational terms why you're disappointed in your child's bad behaviour.
You won't be that mum who yells EVER!
The Screentime Dilemma
You'll be Super Mum who's amazing at arts & crafts and playing backyard games and never, ever checks her phone!
Nope, you would NEVER catch yourself getting sucked into Facebook when your child's around. Absolutely not!
The Daily Dinner
Once your family starts growing you'll have home-cooked family dinners EVERY night.
Or not.
The First Mum's Night Out
One night you FINALLY get all your married and babied friends together for the night of your liiiivesss!!!!
Until you realise chillin' at the bar with college boys who are trying to satisfy a MILF curiosity is NOT your idea of relaxing...
The Marriage
Finally, you and your partner promise to keep it spicy and hot no matter how many kids you have.
A few pregnancies later, the last thing you want at the end of a long day is another human being clawing at your for your attention.
What aspects of parenting surprised you? Tweet us @sofeminineUK
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